Benevolent vs. Hostile Sexism

Throughout The Real Housewives of Orange County it has been apparent that these women choose their husbands not for love, but for their occupations, cash and status. But, why?! Castro explains that, “Gender roles, along with marital roles and other specific roles (e.g. occupation), then guide preferences for types of mates (604). This is because women and men want to maximize their outcomes. These women surely do maximize their outcomes by marrying for financial support, but the men do the same thing because in marrying these women as sole caretakers (with the help of their nannies) they can focus on life outside of the home (i.e. their work and making money). This is probably the easiest way to describe the situation we see in many of the housewives; marrying for successful men.

All of the information described above is a great example of benevolent sexism. Benevolent sexism is “positive attitudes towards traditional women” (605). This show can almost fit in to this definition completely because not only is it praising the patriarchal system, but it is also rewarding the women who continue to stay in this domestic role. For example, Alexis Bellino and Peggy Tanous are these traditional women and their husbands treat them well (i.e. shower them with extravagant gifts) and the media portrays their relationships in a very postitive way. Every time we see Peggy and Alexis with their husbands their marriage seems to be running smooth and they are living the dream. These two above images provide an example of these because they both portray the idea of one happy family. (images: http://www.dailymail.co.uk and http://lynnnchicago101.wordpress.com)

On the other hand, The Real Housewives of Orange County represents a form of hostile sexism as well. According to Castro this is when women are punished for taking on the roles that a man usually holds. Vicki Gunvalson and Tamra Barney (shown to the left consoling one another) are perfect examples of this. Vicki Gunvalson is the provider in her household and now her marriage is falling apart and she is divorcing Don. As I watched this marriage unfold throughout the season, the media seemed to portray the main problem as Vicki’s job, which clearly implies that Vicki should not have been trying to do what Don would ‘traditionally’ be doing. Tamra is another woman whose marriage fell apart on this show, but it wasn’t due to occupations. In this case it was because Tamra was trying to take more freedom in her marriage, but as the dominant male Simon would not allow her to do so. On the most recent episode they even show Alexis stating that her traditional relationship style must be better because Vicki and Tamra's relationships are going through divorce and she is still married. (image: http://latimesblogs.latimes.com)

The way that all of these different styles of relationships are represented hand-in-hand with sexism in the media is harming to society. It enforces the idea that if you want to live a happy life, you need to be submissive to your husband and take on the domestic role. Tests ran in 2006 correlate very well with this concept… “In general…women placed greater importance on financial aspects in a mate and men placed greater importance on good cook and housekeeper qualities in a mate” (611). These results could have easily been influence by what women are seeing on television as the correct way to act in society and is diminishing the advancements towards equality in marriage.