Can't Have Both

The image to the left is one of Vicki and Don about a year ago renewing their vows. Vicki promised to start to split her time more equally between family time and work time, but clearly she could not 'have both' because the couple is now headings towards divorce.

Okay, so not all the women are completely dependent on their husbands. For example, Vicki Gunvalson is the breadwinner in her family and her husband is reaping her benefits. Something very interesting that falls into play here though is that Vicki is the least happy housewife in her marriage with Don and throughout all of the seasons numerous troubles are shown within their marriage dynamic. Now, during season 6 Vicki has decided to file for a divorce due to all of this.

The interesting thing about this situation is that it matches up with the statistical information the Giele found in her study on Homemaker or Career Woman. She found that, “The women who worked outside of the home also reported less satisfaction with their husbands and their marriages than the stay-at-home wives” (396). Vicki reports much dissatisfaction with Don throughout the show, but usually it tends to be her own fault. She is very upset that they do not spend a lot of time together and feels that they are living separate lives in their relationship. Here I can really feel for Don because Vicki is always at work and whenever Don would try to tell her to work less she would get very offended. Vicki wants to have the best of both worlds in having a loving relationship with Don and in being successful with her business as an independent woman, but it has proven to be something that is truly impossible. “You can’t have lots of both, but you can have some of both at the same time” (405). Vicki is trying to have lots of both in her life, and when she realizes she can’t do this, instead of managing her time better in order to have some of both, she choose her job over her marriage.

This is something that is very women empowering and Vicki should be given credit for. She didn’t sacrifice her job in order to follow the patriarchal societies viewpoint on marriage, but this is also something that may be very discerning for women that tune into this show. If a man can have a job, and still stay married why can it not work in the reverse direction? Why is it such a problem in a marriage if the woman is the breadwinner? Maybe Vicki’s situation is not the best one to compare this with because she is shown as a complete work-aholic, but she just wants to prove that her family can be just as successful as all of the other housewives who are riding on their husband’s financial situations. Regardless of how you look at it, to viewers watching the show this could definitely implement into a young girls mind that as a working women, you will not have as much satisfaction with your life at home. This could therefore lead to many more women moving back towards the patriarchal way of life and giving up their independence for this so-called ‘happy family’.